Two things I wish I had learned this week

Funny how children can make it crystal clear the extent of things we parents don't know. Even adult children —perhaps even more so our adult children — shed light on the knowledge we lack.

It took the briefest of conversations with Megan this week to make it clear that I've got some learning to do, especially as it relates to two particular situations.

The first thing I wish I had learned this week:
Megan called me a few nights ago to, among other things, express her distress about the manner in which some folks were acting upon the death of a community member. We both agreed that it gets our panties in a bunch when people who were never close to an individual in life muddle about in various states of dithering and distress upon that person's passing, wearing their pain and sadness at the loss of the relatively distant acquaintance as if they had known the deceased dearly, thus justifying their excessive funereal attentions.

That's annoying. And it's so very wrong as it undervalues the pain of those who were intimate with the one who has passed. And it makes you want to shake such individuals for turning heartbreaking situations into being about them, Megan and I agreed. We also agreed in frustration that there needs to be an accurately descriptive word for that behavior that bothers us so.

A later search online for such a word came up with zilch — mostly because how do you search for something you don't know how to describe... which is exactly the reason you're searching?

A word or phrase for such behavior (funeral mongering? faux mourning?) is the first thing I wish I had learned this week. But I didn't.

Intrigued by Gramma's iPhone

The second thing I wish I had learned this week:
Though Megan's phone call to me began with what I noted above, her main reason for calling centered around the fact that Bubby has started taking things that are not his. I guess you could call it stealing. But do 5-year-old kids understand the concept of stealing when they pocket toys and trinkets from others at school and hide them under the covers in their bed? Well, I suppose when put that way, it does kind of seem like stealing.

But that's not what I wanted to learn. After Megan told the tale of Bubby's infractions and subsequent discipline, Megan and I discussed how frustrating it is to discipline a child and have the end result be that though the child may apologize for his or her actions, they show no remorse. It makes you want to shake some sense into them, we agreed. What good is an apology with no remorse?

More importantly, how do you teach remorse? How do you get a kid to truly and honestly feel bad about his bad behavior? Not ashamed, just... remorseful.

Megan asked me what I did when she and her sisters were young when I caught them stealing. To be honest, I could offer only one half memory of dealing with Brianna (I think it was her) nabbing a package of gum once when we were grocery shopping. I made her hand it to the cashier and apologize for taking it. And I kind of, sort of, halfway recall her showing remorse for her bone-headed bungled attempt at thievery.

I racked my brain trying to recall how I managed to get a little remorse out of my gum-nabbing daughter, yet I had no answer. I couldn't offer Megan advice or tips or sage stories of instilling remorse in a 5-year-old kid because, to be honest, I think I just lucked out in that area.

How I could pass along that luck to Megan is the second thing I wish I had learned this week. But I didn't.

Perhaps next week I'll learn the things I wish I had learned this week.

Or perhaps I'll learn the answers to both today... courtesy your comments on my ignorance.

Perhaps?

Update on my sister: There's actually a third thing I wish I had learned this week and that would be the date my sister — who's still on the ICU floor at the hospital in Denver — might return home. Debbie continues to have issues related to her diagnosed pulmonary arterial hypertension, continues to confound doctors with those issues. I did learn she's improved in many respects, though, the learning of which makes the things I didn't learn matter far less.

Enjoy your weekend!

Today's question:

What did you learn — or not learn — this week?

Grandma's good fortune

I reside at the far end of "fortunate" when it comes to being a long-distance grandma. Reason being that despite my grandsons living more than 800 miles away, I get to see Mac and Bubby several times during the year.

I fully realize that is more often than a lot of long-distance grandparents get to see their sweet ones. It's even more often than PawDad, my partner in grandparenting, gets to see his grandsons.

How and why I've gotten so lucky is beyond me. Visits with my grandsons in the past couple years — pretty much since Mac was born — usually close with me unsure of when I'll get to see them again. Then somehow the semi-miraculous occurs and I end up with an unexpected trip to the desert landing in my lap.

Well once again the semi-miraculous has occured. This week the flight details have been finalized, the reservations have been made, and I'm off to see my grandsons midway through October.

As I considered the timing, I quickly realized that October isn't one of my favorite months just because I have few celebrations to plan, but more so because I've had the privilege of seeing my grandsons every October since Bubby was born.

There was last October, when PawDad and I visited together — then I went again alone two weeks later:

 

And the October before, when Megan and the boys visited our house (and we all visited the North Pole):

 

Plus, in October 2010, the month we learned Bubby would be a big brother, I visited sans PawDad:

 

And October 2009:

 

And, of course, there was October 2008, Bubby's very first October:

Yes, October is a very good month for visiting grandsons. I look forward to adding October 2013 to the list.

Did I mention my amazing good fortune?

Today's question:

What month for you features more time with family than any other?

The B-baller and his brother

Look who's old enough to play on a youth basketball team. He couldn't be more happy about it.

Look who's not old enough to play on a youth basketball team. He couldn't be more unhappy about it.

Poor Mac. Such is the injustice of being the little brother.

Photos courtesy Megan, of course. Thanks, Meg!

Today's question:

Where do you fall in the line of siblings and would you have preferred a different position?

Missing the magical ordinary days

Today marks six weeks since I've seen my grandsons. It seems so very much longer than that, as I'm so very much missing the magic of their ordinary days.

Days that looked like this last time I was with them:

It will likely be a while before I get to hug my grandsons — or their parents — again. Thank heavens for the hundreds of photos and videos I take when I'm with them. They keep me smiling from one hug to the next.

Today's question:

What is keeping you smiling today?

Bells will be ringing, plus GRAND Social No. 65

Today the school bell rings and Bubby sets out on his education journey. First stop: Kindergarten!

That's the proud student at his Open House last week as he got his first glimpse of his classroom and teacher. (Do note that the sign in Bubby's hands, pre-photo editing, had Bubby's real name not his bloggy name, handwritten by himself. So cute!)

Meeting a new teacher can be a wee bit scary for little ones, but not Bubby, for his teacher is none other than his mom! This will be Megan's first year teaching at a public school rather than private, and she and Bubby both lucked out with her kindergarten assignment.

Good luck and best wishes to Bubby on his first day in kindergarten! Good luck and best wishes to my daughter Megan, too.

Cheers to a great year for all kiddos and all teachers as the school bells ring!

And for all us grandparents and other Grandma's Briefs readers, cheers to GRAND Social No. 65! Thank you for joining me!

How it works:

• All grandparent bloggers are invited to add a link. You don't have to blog specifically about grandparenting, just be a grandparent who blogs.

• To link up a post, copy the direct URL to the specific post — new or old — that you want to share, not the link to your blog's home page. Then click the blue button marked with "Add your link" below and follow the directions.

• You can add up to three posts, but no duplicates, contests, giveaways, or Etsy sites, please.

• Adding a mention such as This post linked to the GRAND Social to your linked posts is appreciated. Or, you can post the GRAND Social button anywhere on your page using the following code:

<a href="/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><img src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg " alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" width="125" height="125" /></a>

• The GRAND Social linky is open for new posts through Wednesday evening, so please come back to see those added after your first visit.


• If you're not a blogger, you have the pleasure of being a reader. Bloggers who link up would be honored to have one and all — other bloggers as well as readers — visit, read and, if so moved, comment, even if just a "Hey, stopping by from the GRAND Social."

• For another grandparent linky, visit Connie's Grandparent's Say It Saturday Link Party each Saturday.

What I learned this week: Pepperoni Bird beats out Bomb Bird

My grandsons love, love, love Angry Birds.

When I visited my grandsons last April, Mac delighted in his Angry Birds crackers.

When Bubby had his birthday in June, he was thrilled to receive from Gramma and PawDad a stuffed Bomb Bird — has all-time fave Angry Bird — to play with indoors plus a Bomb Bird wind chime to listen to outdoors.

And then there's the Angry Birds tattoos I told you all about last week.

Yes, my grandsons love, love, love Angry Birds.

Bubby plays Angry Birds on Daddy's iPhone every chance he gets. Sometimes he gives Mac a turn at playing it, too. Amazingly, Mac — who just turned 2 in June — actually knows what to do.

Considering their obsession with love for the grumpy feathered friends, I knew when I saw this Angry Birds pizza on the Gombby Facebook page a while back that I just had to surprise Bubby and Mac with it during my recent visit.

Now, I don't really know a darn thing about Angry Birds, other than the black one is named Bomb Bird. I have never played the game, have seen just snippets while Bubby and Mac played. Still, I think I managed to pull off the Angry Birds look fairly well — despite using a hard-boiled egg for the eyeballs instead of the mushrooms that were supposed to be there. (Meh... mushrooms or eggs, the boys would eat neither anyway, so why waste the money on mushrooms that would be pitched before the pizza was cut?)

I told the boys the pizza was named "Pepperoni Bird." They seemed pretty pleased with the moniker as well as the overall look of their surprise pizza.

Sure, it wasn't quite as cool as a Bomb Bird pizza might have been. But I have no doubt that despite looking Angry Bird awesome, a pizza covered with black olives would have gone directly into the garbage quicker than those boiled-egg eyes did.

Bomb Bird may be a hit in the game — and as a stuffed toy and a wind chime, too — but when it comes to pizza, Pepperoni Bird always wins out.

And that is what I learned this week.

Have a lovely weekend! See ya back here Monday for the GRAND Social and more!

Today's question:

How would you rate your Angry Birds skills?

Newfound skills

Hard to believe, but one week from today, Grandma's Briefs will be four years old.

My very first post, published July 25, 2009, featured a Bubby that looked just like this:

Now, four years later, here is that precious baby boy displaying for Gramma some of his newfound skills:

I'm pretty proud of how far Grandma's Briefs has come since that first post four years ago. I'm even more proud of how far Bubby has come since that first post four years ago.

The kid is indeed awesome... times four and more!

Today's question:

Of Bubby's newfound skills, which are you best at?

What I learned this week: Tattoos aren't as painful as I expected

I considered getting a tattoo years ago. I wanted something subtle and relatively small, and I flirted with the idea of getting a thin ankle bracelet tattoo of some sort. From what I hear, though, getting an ankle tattoo would be rather painful because there's so little fatty tissue on my ankles (well, on most days). I'm not a fan of pain, so I never got that — or any — tattoo.

Yesterday I finally got a tattoo, and it wasn't painful at all. I've no doubt that the pain-free application was because of the loving-yet-professional manner in which the tattoo artist worked. That tattoo artist being my grandson.

Bubby's tattooing technique elicited not even the slightest wince or grimace from Gramma as he applied the cheeriest of flower tattoos upon my ankle.

Tattoo work courtesy Bubby was done as a barter deal. Once he had completed my tattoo, I returned the favor by applying tattoos to him and his brother, Mac. The designs were admittedly less cheery than my smiling flower; the "Angry Birds" tatts were selected by each boy, as were the locations for their faux flair.

Despite Mac's woebegone look in the photo above, the process was as pain-free for my grandsons as it was for me. Which supported my assertion that getting a tattoo isn't as painful as I've assumed all these years. At least not when applied by my grandson — or by a grandma.

And that is what I learned this week.

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone. May it be as painless as the process of getting tattooed — with temporary tattoos, that is.

Today's question:

What did you learn this week? (And if you have a tattoo tale or two, please share.)

17 things I'll do this week

I'm flying to the desert today to spend a week with my grandsons. Here are...

17 things I'll do this week:
(in no particular order — except for No. 1)

1. Swelter in the desert heat.

2. Hug Bubby.

 

3. Cool down with my grandsons at the water park.

4. Hug Mac.

 

5. Jump with my grandsons at the indoor trampoline center (Kegels, don't fail me now!).

6. Hug Megan.

7. Sit with Bubby on one side and Mac on the other while enjoying Despicable Me 2 at the theater.

8. Collect more artwork from my grandsons for hanging on my refrigerator.

 

9. Take a picture or two (thousand).

10. Worry about scorpions and lizards crossing my path — or getting in my bed.

11. Watch Bubby jump from the diving board.

12. Be proud of Mac, who is reportedly potty-trained.

13. Teach Bubby how to play Froggy Boogie.

14. Think of my partner in grandparenting, who couldn't visit our grandsons with me (and find time to Facetime him with the boys).

15. Read Dr. Seuss' Bartholomew and the Oobleck and make oobleck.

16. Hug Bubby and Mac again... and again and again.

 

17. Be one heckuva happy grandma!

Today's question:

What will you do this week?

Five and ready to dive

Bubby loves the water. For several years now, my oldest grandson has taken swimming lessons.

He's enjoyed outdoor lessons:

And he's enjoyed indoor lessons:

What Bubby has not enjoyed was being restricted by Mommy and Daddy from jumping off the diving board on his own. Bubby has begged Mommy and Daddy again and again to be allowed to jump off the diving board like the big kids. Their response was always, "You'll get to do that when you're 5 years old."

Well, guess what? Bubby turned 5 years old this week.

Which meant the waiting was over!

The much anticipated dive attempt was planned for Bubby's official birthday.

So on Tuesday, Bubby's official birthday, a visit to the pool was the highlight of the day.

Bubby stepped right up, and he jumped right in:

Mission accomplished!

Another milestone met, another big-boy achievement checked off.

Today's question:

When did you last jump off a diving board?