Thoughts on my daughter's miscarriage

My daughter lost her baby last week. A miscarriage in the first trimester.

Coming from an abundantly fertile family, it's hard to wrap my head around that. My mom had seven children. Three of my sisters had several children, and a number of those kids had kids. I had three children myself, and my middle child had three children, too.

All of us had no problem. Yet it's a problem for my oldest child, Brianna.

"Problem" doesn't come close to accurately describing the fertility challenge for my daughter. A dead baby is far more than a problem. It's a painful, traumatic, inexplicable loss.

My 33-year-old daughter, who learned just this past year that her chances for conceiving and delivering a child are sadly...continue reading on PurpleClover.com.

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When A Teen Mom Hits Midlife

In the summer of 1982, I graduated from high school, turned 18, got married and had a baby. I went from kid to wife and mother in the span of three months, just like that.

My husband was 21 at the time. Now, 33 years later, we're empty-nesters. We've patted ourselves on the back for a job well done. We beat the odds and raised three lovely and amazing daughters from diapers to dorm rooms and into the real world. Our journey featured little outside the typical bumps, bruises and pains of parenthood, despite the fact that we were mere children ourselves at the outset. Our girls are grown and gone—one has even made us grandparents.

Time to rejoice! Time to enjoy midlife!

Time for an unexpected reality check, is more like it.

Once my kids split and I recovered from the initial empty-nest jitters, it became clear that having been a teen mother would...Continue reading on PurpleClover.com

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7 Ways to Be a Cool Grandparent

As a baby boomer, I like to think of myself as being pretty hip. And even though my middle child, a Millennial and the mother of two, doesn’t always see me that way, she does admit that I am one cool grandma.

My grandsons, 5 and 2, think I’m a pretty neat grandma, too. How do I know? Last January, when I visited them in Arizona, I brought some…Continue reading on Next Avenue

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How to Avoid Taking Sides in Family Arguments

My husband and I went through a challenging time several decades ago, as people in most long-term (and short-term) marriages do. Nothing all that unusual for a young couple battling the growing pains of lifelong commitment.

What was unusual, though — and unforgettable to me — was the response of my parents: They rallied behind my husband. My mom and dad comforted and cared for their son-in-law rather than their daughter.

Sure, I was the one questioning…Continue reading on Next Avenue

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How to Be a Grandparent Fit for a King

With the eyes of the world focused on the new royal baby, there’s much chatter about what William and Katherine will name the future king, how they’ll rear him and, interestingly, the roles of both sets of grandparents.

It’s normal for in-laws to feel a little competitive with the “other” side: Imagine trying to outdo the Windsors! But being a terrific grandparent is not, ultimately, about the bestowing of material gifts...Continue reading on Next Avenue

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How to Help Your Unmarried Child Find Love

The current dating scene is a depressing place: too few suitable options and fewer still willing to commit. And far too many tears after yet another less-than-stellar first date.

Such things should matter not one whit to me, a happily married 49-year-old grandmother. But they do matter — a lot. My heart breaks every time I witness, counsel and console my oldest, never-wed daughter...Continue reading on Next Avenue

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6 Family Stories to Tell Your Grandchildren Again and Again

My daughter, mother of my two grandsons, is an early childhood educator. Each school year, my daughter hosts a Grandparents Day celebration and encourages her students to invite a grandparent (or two) to attend school with them. One highlight of Grandparents Day is when the students "interview" their grandparents on what school was like for them at their grandchild’s age. The anecdotes shared by the grandparents, my daughter says, never fail to dazzle and often downright befuddle the rapt grandchildren... Continue reading on Considerable (formerly Grandparents.com)

• Plus many others articles on Grandparents.com during my time as a regular writer there, pieces that, alas, disappeared upon the site’s demise.

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10 Things for Grandparents to Quit Fretting About

Grandparents far too often fret and fear that they're somehow not the grandparent they should be. For all you worry-wart grandparents, I suggest you stop fretting about the following when it comes to your grandchildren...Continue reading on Huffington Post

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Who Puts Baby in a Corner? Not This Grandma

My favorite grandma never spanked me. She also never yelled at me, reprimanded me or restricted me.

My not-so-favorite grandma? Well, she never spanked me, either. She did, though, once make me drink grape juice I didn't want. I immediately vomited up the purple stuff; grandma immediately yelled at me...Continue reading on Huffington Post

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The Perils of Pauline Multiplied: My Girly Girl Daughter Now Mothers All-Boy Boys

My grandsons live more than 800 miles away from me, so I see them only occasionally. One of the perks of being a long-distance grandma — and there are a few — is the obvious growth and maturing of my grandsons from one visit to the next.

I delight...Continue reading on Huffington Post

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Becoming Grandma Too Soon: Tips for Navigating an Unplanned Pregnancy

As our children become young adults and we envision our eventual role as Grandma, we all imagine a certain scene, a certain set of events leading up to the glorious title and tasks of family matriarch. The imagined scene doesn't usually include a teen daughter — or a teen son...Continue reading on Huffington Post

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