significant bes of being grandmother.jpg

BE unconditional

Grandchildren come in assorted shapes, sizes, aptitudes, attitudes, with varied qualities and quirks. Love them because of those, regardless of those, in spite of those.

BE fair

Wherever two or more grandkids gather or grow, possibilities for playing favorites flourish. Avoid the all-too-human temptation to fancy one over another.

BE forgiving

Grandchildren will inevitably — in some ways small, others larger — fail you, hurt you, do wrong by you, do wrong despite their better judgement and upbringing. They are human, just like the rest of us. They deserve forgiveness, just like the rest of us.

BE creative

Seek new and novel activities, events, ways to connect. Pursue unique and uncommon opportunities to get together, play together, wonder together, learn, laugh and love others together.

BE there — even when you're not

When with grandchildren, be present not preoccupied or plugged in. Genuinely listen, respond, react to the unique piece of you in your presence. When apart, ensure grandkids know how to reach you by phone, email, regular mail, and social networks (as appropriate). There's comfort for both sides in knowing you're nearby albeit afar.

BE willing to take a backseat

Additional grandmothers and others — and parents, of course — loom large in the lives of beloved grands. Sometimes more often, more prominently, more locally than you. Grandchildren need networks of important, impactful adults in their lives. Allow space for such sans groans or grudges.

BE yourself

Grandchildren ideally have passels of people who delight in and adore them. Yet they have only one you. Rather than compare yourself to allegedly enviable others, relax and bask in just being yourself — the only beloved you your grandchildren expect and want you to be.

Today's question:

What BEs would you add?