The Saturday Post: Jim, Jimmy & Elvis edition

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I'm in the desert and although I'm loving my time with Bubby and Mac, I wish only that Jim had been able to join us. So this one's about Jim. For Jim. Because, as Bubby says, we don't want PawDad to feel "alonely" while Gramma's away.

I hope this video of the <cuss> earworm my husband inflicted me with before I left song Jim's been singing the last few days will let him know we're all thinking of him.

And I hope everyone else will appreciate this brief glimpse into the wackiness otherwise known as My Life With Jim. Just imagine him twanging it up singing this tune. It happens. Often. Quite often. I usually groan when he starts it up; today I sort of miss it...and Jim. (All together now: "Awwww...!")

Feel a little less alonely now, PawDad? Bubby and I hope so!

Today's question:

What Jimmy Buffet song(s) do you know all the lyrics to?

Sweet searches (or, A sure sign perimenopause has hit)

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As some of you know, I've had a little trouble with the Grandma's Briefs site this past week, related to commenting. It's all fixed now (as long as you clear your browser cache and are using IE 9 if you use Internet Explorer).

In trying to suss all that out, I ventured into a few spots in the analytics area of my site that I haven't been in a while. And it nearly made me cry. Not, I assure you, because the numbers are low or the problems are high, or anything like that. (Believe it or not, I'm not that shallow. Most of the time.)

What nearly brought me to tears was looking at the search queries. I've written posts in the past about the wacky search terms that lead folks to Grandma's Briefs, but this time I didn't find the queries all that wacky. I found them to be sweet, poignant.

Of course, wackiness wasn't completely absent as the query list included "justy grandmas" (?) and "land before time baby dinosaur hatching in" (??). But for the most part, the search terms included primarily variations of these that touched my heart:

• how to be the best newborn grandma

• heart grows with the love of a child

• my granddaughter makes me laugh out loud

• how to give away grandmas stuff

• letters to grandson

• letter to my 18 year old grandson

• letter to grandson going off to college

• poems for grandmas who passed away

• farewell, grandma

• what grandmas do best

• how hard it is to be a far away grandma

Such queries made me glad I could provide a soft landing spot even if not the exact answers folks were looking for.

Mostly, though, such terms made me deeply grateful that today—this afternoon!—this far away grandma finally gets to hug and hold close her sweet grandsons.

Today's question:

If you were guaranteed a true, accurate answer, what question or search (realistic or not) would you most like to find results for today?

Choices

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I was going to write something profound, something memorable for today's post. But soon after waking, I found I had to make a choice: food for thought or food for Jim?

Food for Jim won out.

Why?

Because this is the sad state of my refrigerator today, and I leave tomorrow—without Jim—for the desert to visit Bubby and Mac (and Megan and Preston):

I didn't grocery shop before BlogHer, and Jim survived on what was in a similarly empty fridge. Although I'm pretty sure that's mostly because he ordered take-out every single night I was in San Diego.

But I can't do that to him again.

So unless he's to survive on sun tea, three tomatoes, three lemons, Snak-Pak pudding, condiments, and carrots—well, not really the carrots, as those are the dogs' treats—while I'm away, I need to go go grocery shopping. Today.

Sometimes we gotta make the tough choices in life. This is the one I must make today. And believe me, it's tough because I loathe, loathe, loathe grocery shopping. More than anything. Ever.

And let me make it known here and now that after making this tough choice and visiting the oh-so-loathesome grocery store to buy food to fill the fridge for Jim instead of posting profound punditry for my friends, I will kill Jim if he chooses to order out for every meal again while I'm away. Really. No joke. No codswallop.

Cross your fingers Jim makes the right choice.

Although...if he doesn't...the wrath he faces will surely make for a profound and memorable post for you all to read upon my return.

So go ahead. You make a choice: Which scenario will you be crossing your fingers for?

I'll keep you posted on the resultant state of the refrigerator. And Jim.

Today's question:

What is the state of your refrigerator today?

Sense and nonsense

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Because my brain has been taxed far too much in the past week thanks to BlogHer '11 and doing my best to organize and utilize all I learned there, today I'm taking a break. I'm serving up nonsense, by way of today's New Word Wednesday.

And the word is ...

CODSWALLOP (KODZ wol uhp) noun nonsense; rubbish.

—Dictionary.com

In my dreams, I'm quite luculent and offer profundities beyond compare, but the reality is that what I serve up more often than not is heaping helpings of codswallop.

I've decided that going forward, instead of telling Jim now and then that he's full of <cuss>, er, baloney, I'll be telling him he's full of codswallop. Makes sense to me.

THIS WEEK'S GRILLED GRANDMA

For anyone who might think grandmas have little to offer and spend hours upon hours rocking away in a rocking chair, despairing that the best years of their lives have gone by—and that surely better not cannot be any regular visitors of Grandma's Briefs—one quick look at this week's Grilled Grandma should dispel that belief.

Lissa is the newest gorgeous, vibrant, and funny member of the Grilled Grandma club, and I hope you'll give her a warm welcome by way of comments on her grilling and clicks to her blog. You can start it all off right here at Grilled Grandma: Lissa. Be sure not to miss the shot of her with her four grown kids near the bottom of the grilling. The love between them in the photo is nearly palpable. So sweet!

Happy Wednesday, my grandma and non-grandma friends!

Today's question:

Provide one bit of truth and one bit of codswallop about yourself, leaving it up to those of us who read the comments to decide which is which.