As long-time readers may have noticed—because of postings here and here, to name a few—I'm continually amused and sometimes even touched by the search terms that lead people to Grandma's Briefs.

Time again for me to share with you those that most make me go "Huh?"

First off, let me say that other than phrases related to grandmas and grandsons, always at the top of the query list for my site is pit bull. Why? Well, my dog Mickey is part pit bull (other part pointer). I occasionally blog about him. Apparently a lot of people are searching—be it out of love, fear, or disdain—for information on animals that look and act much like my Mickey. All I can figure is I need to start another blog, perhaps called Pit Bull Briefs. I have no doubt, according to my list of query terms, that it would be quite popular—at least on the search engines.

Other than pit bull, here are some of my more curious queries in the last week, plus links to what the unsuspecting searchers ended up being directed to.

I love macaroni — Believe it or not, in the past week I've had not only one person but two who reached Grandma's Briefs by typing that into the Google search bar. I do love macaroni, especially when paired with cheese. I have a feeling my fellow mac lovers were a little disappointed, though, when their love affair led them here.

Owl quotes — I'm not sure how, when, or why someone might think they'd find quotes from owls online (Is it even possible to quote an owl? Do they say anything quote worthy? In a language we'd understand?), but again, not just one but two people got here looking for wisdom from owls. Instead, they got this, which does feature a cool owl photo (not by me), but nothing uttered by an owl, not even a hoo-hoo of any sort.

Scholarships for grandmas — If there is such a thing, I want to sign up, too. Maybe the searcher, if they happen to be reading this, will share the successful results from their search. This sponsored post certainly didn't get them any closer to the pot of gold they were searching for.

Not just a chicken bagel recipe — I've heard of several kinds of bagels but never a chicken bagel. They certainly got something that's not just a chicken bagel recipe when they stumbled upon my Homemade Bagels post.

Guilty baby — This one makes me sad, to be quite honest. Babies are innocent, guiltless beings—even when at their most frustrating. I worry why one might search for that term and what they plan to do to the baby they assume is guilty. It's even more disconcerting when seeing that three people used that specific search term and ended up on Grandma's Briefs. I hope they thought twice about the guilt of the child in question when they were met with my post on being a guilt-ridden grandma.

So not guilty!

"Stinky diaper" — Yes, it even had the quote marks around it. If a dirty diaper was a challenge for them, I can only imagine what they thought when landing on my Tough (Grand) Mudder post.

Hide in leaves — If you need directions on how to do it, you're seriously missing out on the fallen leaf fun. Bubby had no trouble figuring it out, as evidenced here.

What is one word for not improved — Apparently this person never heard of an online thesaurus. I doubt this post gave them what they sought. Though maybe they enjoyed the photo of Bubby and Mac.

What to write about a grandson's smile — Nothing curious about that one, really. It's just a sweet search. And one that made me smile. I hope what they found here helped them write what they'd hoped to — and made them smile.

Today's question:

What did you last search for online?

As some of you know, I've had a little trouble with the Grandma's Briefs site this past week, related to commenting. It's all fixed now (as long as you clear your browser cache and are using IE 9 if you use Internet Explorer).

In trying to suss all that out, I ventured into a few spots in the analytics area of my site that I haven't been in a while. And it nearly made me cry. Not, I assure you, because the numbers are low or the problems are high, or anything like that. (Believe it or not, I'm not that shallow. Most of the time.)

What nearly brought me to tears was looking at the search queries. I've written posts in the past about the wacky search terms that lead folks to Grandma's Briefs, but this time I didn't find the queries all that wacky. I found them to be sweet, poignant.

Of course, wackiness wasn't completely absent as the query list included "justy grandmas" (?) and "land before time baby dinosaur hatching in" (??). But for the most part, the search terms included primarily variations of these that touched my heart:

• how to be the best newborn grandma

• heart grows with the love of a child

• my granddaughter makes me laugh out loud

• how to give away grandmas stuff

• letters to grandson

• letter to my 18 year old grandson

• letter to grandson going off to college

• poems for grandmas who passed away

• farewell, grandma

• what grandmas do best

• how hard it is to be a far away grandma

Such queries made me glad I could provide a soft landing spot even if not the exact answers folks were looking for.

Mostly, though, such terms made me deeply grateful that today—this afternoon!—this far away grandma finally gets to hug and hold close her sweet grandsons.

Today's question:

If you were guaranteed a true, accurate answer, what question or search (realistic or not) would you most like to find results for today?